I have played video games ever since I was three. I played great classics such as Crash Bandicoot, Mario and Resident Evil (Don’t ask me how I got that when I was three years old.) But never in my life have I seen such a beautiful game.
FLAPPY BIRD
Yes, Flappy Bird is the best game that I have ever seen, it shows innovation, content, quality, quantity and most important of all: Love.
The creator of Flappy Bird is probably the only indie developer to make something amazing, considering that he doesn’t even have a team.
He managed to put in small phones graphics superior to Crysis that don’t slow your Nokia down. Sometimes I play Flappy Bird a lot and I think that I’m ACTUALLY in the game. It just shows how beautiful the graphics of this game are, it shows that 8-bit pixel graphics of most indie developers nowadays are just there because the developers are lazy, but the creator of Flappy Bird managed to make amazing AAAA graphics in only thirty minutes, these graphics are so amazing that the AAA deserves an extra A.
The plot of Flappy Bird is also amazing, the amount of detail spent on the script probably was three years because of the huge amount of content in the game, the developer probably wanted to express all of his emotions in this game, and he managed to do that, this game has such a beautiful story that I got depressed when it ended, this story is better than most AAA games like Bioshock Infinite and Dark Souls. Yes, Dark Souls pales in confront of this game, Dark Souls was once a great game for me, but now it just looks a buggy, badly rendered game with horrible gameplay and plot, that’s how much better this game is.
But lets talk about the sauce of the game: The gameplay of Flappy Bird is rich and original since it abandons the common and obsolete genres of nowadays, only now have I been enlightened and found out that Stealth, First Person Shooters and all other genres are the most horrible kind of games in existence, they all deserve to burn in a fire just because they don’t reach the level of originality that Flappy Bird has. It’s also amazing that the creator of Flappy Bird managed to insert so many complex controls to master with only one button: Your finger. This complex but great mechanic is called finger tapping and it’s put to great use, it enhances virtual reality much better than most tools like Kinect and I bet that the Oculus Rift will only reach this level of immersion after 9 years of development.
Flappy Bird only has a versus game mode where you fight against an AI bird, you can choose about 4 different types of bird, but the game chooses for you! It tells you to relax, it tells you that video games are made for relaxing, it shows us the deep truth that nowadays we’ve been playing video games for too long, playing them “competitively”. How disgusting. Yes, that’s what the creator of Flappy Bird wanted to show us, he wanted to show us that video games were about relaxation, not getting 99 killstreaks, I quickly sold all of my Call of Duty games to local charity today and helped dozens of hungry children.
But that doesn’t mean that Flappy Bird isn’t full of gameplay, it has tons of it. Thanks to this incredible engine called the F.L.A.P engine. The F.L.A.P engine allows the game to render real-time bird graphics, real-time bird feather textures, realistic bird physics, enhanced wind support and most of all, DRM for ever.
Yes, I once thought that DRM was a curse, but now it’s a blessing, now you can be online with EVERYONE and show them how beautiful this game is, show your family about the beauty of Flappy Bird. It’s amazing, so amazing, that you just have to know about it.
But now let’s talk about the beautiful game, once you start the game there should be an AI bird waiting to beat you up real nice, but it isn’t there. That’s the same message, don’t be competitive, just enjoy the great graphics and play the game, look at those amazing pipe textures with no pressure from anything else, there is a minimal HUD made of pixel art just for this, in order to keep you away from looking at its ugliness and enjoy the game. Sometimes your bird will die when hitting pipes, it just shows to know that the creator’s legacy will live on forever thanks to this game, some would think that it’s vanity, but it’s true, this game will make him live forever, respawn infinitely in the cosmos. This game makes every other game look obsolete and it’s the dream game, but yet it exists.
This game is Flappy Bird, and it’s free, and you should get it.
But you can’t.
Because this game was so amazing, that it had to be removed, we would’ve stopped living our lives and just keep on playing Flappy Bird, we would’ve died out because of our addiction.
The creator knew this, so he saved us by removing the game, he decided to stop making amazing games and I thank him for that.
Flappy Bird doesn’t exist anymore, but it had the best things of every game, I’ll have to go back to play poorly made games now, but it’s for the best.
I’ll however never forget the awesomeness of Flappy Bird.
7 responses to “Greatest achievement in gaming: Flappy Bird”
Mm, yes, good read, yes. You are quite good, my fine sir, in finally reviewing this prestigious game. Everybody knows this game was mankind’s greatest creation, FINALLY it gets the praise it deserve, yes, indeed. If only it still existed, yes, and we could pass this drug-like gift down the generation, yes, mm, indeed, oh, yes.
…….I’m not quite sure how I feel about this.
Just feel….Feel it…
Feel the game’s essence, piercing and modifying your human body, ridding it of imperfections…
Know that when you leave this mortal realm, you shall be a beautiful bird in Flappy Bird…
Rise like a phoenix from the ashes, live in the flappy-ness of our bird god.
Feel the flap. Feel the bird.
this is beautiful
I’m up to 26 pipes. Thank god I got this before it was removed
My record is 111 anyone can beat it ?